Progress photos

•March 16, 2011 • 2 Comments

I’ve been neglecting you guys lately and I apologize!

Here are some progress photos as of today. (I can’t really tell the difference between February & March – mostly because I think I’ve lost 10 pounds of boob.)

I will be back soon, PROMISE!

(I actually had a much longer post I composed on my phone and lost the whole thing. Grr.)



•February 16, 2011 • 1 Comment

My official weigh in this morning (Tuesday) was 235 pounds. That is a fifteen pound loss since January 3rd. To be perfectly honest, I am disappointed in that number.

This time around, it’s been different. The cravings are far less, cheating few and far between and numbers much lower. I’m having a hard time believing my age is playing a factor (I’m only 25!) and am beginning to think the RIGHT way is the SLOW way.

If I was able to keep my ass off the damn scale I’d be a lot better off. Alas, I cannot. Woe.

At the moment, exercise is alluding me and I am 100% okay with it. For now. I wake up as it is at 6:00 am (or earlier) to a crying baby, out the door by 7:00 to make the thirty minute trip to daycare, deal with all the bullshit at work, make the hour trip home, cook dinner, clean up from dinner, do laundry, clean, bathe Landon, put him to bed, clean up the house for the night, get bottles/food/my breakfast and lunch ready for the next day, bathe MYSELF, and somewhere in between try to keep Mark happy. So, exercise? Not at the top of my list or even in the middle of my list.

I took a picture of myself this morning to document what I look like in real clothes. Here is what 235 pounds looks like, on me.

You see!? Landon does wear clothes, most of the time. You can totally see the Asian in him in this photo.

The cocked hip is not a slimming technique but merely, an attempt to keep my sleepy baby from crashing to the ground.

Also, please don’t judge me by the extreme LACK of furnishings in our bedroom, we lack funds to accomplish such things.

Let’s get Ferber-ized!

•February 8, 2011 • 2 Comments

Since Landon got sick a few weeks ago, our nights have been ROUGH. In the course of the few days he was sick, he got very used to us coming in to soothe him in the middle of the night.

Prior to the Great Plague of 2011, he was sleeping like a champ. He would drink his bottle, say goodnight to Daddy, and be put in his crib without incident. No screaming or crying just a roll to the side to cuddle with his blankie and he was zonked out.

Yesterday, Mark and I (in our exhaustion fog) decided something had to be done. Our sweet boy was going to learn that hours between 9 PM – 6 AM are not made for cuddles. I had heard about the Ferber method a few times before, when Landon was a teensy baby, and thought it was a bit cruel for what I was trying to accomplish at the time. Now?

Landon rarely fusses unless he is very tired or very hungry. The plan was, at the first sign of fuss he would get a bath, bottle and then bed.

The Fuss” reared it’s ugly head around 7:00 last night but we kept it at bay with an empty diaper box until 7:30. Go us! Bathtime was accomplished by 7:45. Bedtime preparations were over by 8:00 and he was in his bed by 8:15. Previously, we would try to keep him up past 9:30 in hopes he’d be so exhausted he would sleep all night. Clearly, we are geniuses dumbasses.

As I walked him to his crib to lay him down the realization hit him and the screaming began. I gave him a kiss and whispered night-night and put him down. OH, did I also mention, we are paci breaking at the same time? We are gluttons for punishments, obvs!

He screamed for approximately 28 mintes. Just as suddenly as it began, it stopped. I wanted to go and check on him so badly. I waited. I sure in Hell was not about to wake him up.

When I finally snuck in there, he was sound asleep, snoring like a grown man. No paci and no soothing from Mama.

The victory in the whole thing is, he slept from 8:45ish until I woke him up this morning. No middle of the night cuddle calls.

Hopefully it continues this way.

Here is my guy last night trying to get the diaper box off the couch.

Yes, I am aware that the kid never wears pants.

I’ll blame it on the nuts.

•February 8, 2011 • Leave a Comment

Walnuts, that is.

Every morning for breakfast during the week, I have the same thing to eat. High fiber or weight control oatmeal with a 1/4 cup of chopped walnuts and 1/4 cup fat free milk.

Somehow, in my silly little brain, I totally underestimated the Points+ value of the walnuts. If you do the math of the breakfast (4 point oatmeal)+(6 point omg walnuts)+(1 point milk) = 11 points for breakfast.


An egg McMuffin is only 8 points.

I don’t even know what I was thinking. Besides, not thinking at all. There is no telling just how many points I was going over each day.

Basically, in summary, shiiiiiiiiit.

Superbowl happened this weekend and may I just tell you all, I shot my proverbial wad on that one. Crumb cake muffins and cookie cake. That shit isn’t even typical Superbowl food.

I tried to stay away. I did. This morning, I felt like I was My stomach felt like it was being braided up into a french braid and tied up into a rubberband. Yeah, like that!

Now, thinking back on it, it wasn’t even slightly worth it. My small victory of the evening? I didn’t drink any beer.

Slow beginners

•February 4, 2011 • 4 Comments

Invisible friends, I need your advice.

Landon is almost nine months old, in about two weeks. He doesn’t crawl, or even attempt to crawl. When on his stomach he doesn’t even get up on his hands and knees. His pediatrician has assured me he will crawl on his own time but, as the weeks fly by, the more worried I become. Maybe it’s the sheer weight that hinders his progress, maybe he is lazy like his Mom.

We have tried to bribe him with, every! thing! No interest, whatsoever. On his stomach, he flips almost immediately. Mark and I have gotten down on our hands and knees to SHOW him how it’s done. We prop him on HIS hands and knees to show him how he SHOULD be positioned, arms give out.

Also, he has no teeth buds.

So, any advice?

Photo Update

•February 3, 2011 • 11 Comments

It’s been about 1 month since I started my diet so I thought I should show you the “before” and “after” so far. Tell me if you see a difference at all.

Also, sorry about the crappy iPhone quality, Mark might think it was a little weird if I took my actual camera into the bathroom. So yes, a definite difference. I can see it now that the pics are side-by-side. 

Loving that I am wearing my pre-preg jeans (that I love) and they are loose. They are so awesomely soft and worn and holey and ahhhh. I is happy.

I’m having some frustrations about the competition but I’ll have to discuss them later.

By the way, is anyone actually here?

The Great Plague

•February 1, 2011 • 2 Comments

First of all, let me tell you all to put on your gas masks and fumigate your ambient air with many bottles of Lysol.  I am convinced that this PLAGUE I’ve been fighting is certainly powerful enough to infect all of the interwebs. Proceed with caution. The past two weeks has been a frenzy of Theraflu, Kleenex coated with lotion & vicks (ah!) and cough drops, many many cough drops.

Two Fridays ago, I picked Landon up from daycare and noticed he was a little wheezy and a little nose drippy. Saturday and Sunday he slept until ten! o’clock! I should have known that the mid-night wakings during the week were a precursor to aforementioned, PLAGUE! Sunday he woke with a nasty cough, stuffy and sneezy. When it became obvious that he wasn’t in fact, going to magically get better, I made the call to EL JEFE (the boss, for all of you non Spanish speakers) and let her know I wouldn’t be in. 

Oh. Did I mention the several cases of RSV and walking pneumonia in his school?  Monday morning we saw the pediatrician and Landon was given the diagnosis, bronchitis and ear infection. Is it wrong to be thankful that is ALL it was? He was prescribed amoxicillin, albuterol and a cough medicine. We walked out the doors ushered by the words, “it’ll probably get worse before it gets better. Have a nice day!” Well, thanks for speaking that one into existence, shithead. Landon did in fact, get much worse before he got better.

We stayed home again on Tuesday. Let me be the first to assure you that taking care of a sick baby while you yourself are sick, is a torture worse than water boarding. Also, just for future reference, pink amoxicillin puke piles stain. Badly. It was the first time I can honestly say, I’ve panicked as a mother. I was this close to packing him into the car and heading to the ER. Thankfully, I was talked down and reassured that all was fine when he smiled at me with a little pink puke on his chin. Like, ha! mom! I’m fine. Seriously, no more of that pink shit. Is gross.

He is totally fine now.

Me? Not so much. Am still dying of THE PLAGUE. My boogers are like Elmer’s rubber cement, my sinuses are pounding and I have to blow my nose every 3 seconds to keep from choking on snot. I am a sexy beast. 

Thus, the diet suffered tragically last week. I didn’t track my points at all. I’m fairly certain that the 3 bags of cough drops I ate took me WAY over the legal limit. I gained about half a pound which was not at all surprising.

I still feel like death but I have started exercising. Blah. Hoping for a good week, eating wise.

In other, totally unrelated news, the Northerns are currently descending on our lovely sub tropical State. So let me just say, Welcome to The Great State of  (no, we do not ride horses to work) Texas! I hope you enjoy your short break from the usual Winter weather of your frozen tundra. Oh, ha, HA! We fooled you didn’t we? My bets are that you were basking in the warmth of our lovely weather in your cargo shorts in t-shirts, right about the time all Hell broke loose and the temperature dropped thirty something degrees. Enjoy your stay, I hope you brought your mittens and your car insurance policy! You know we Texans don’t know how to drive in this bullshit!